'chicken! chicken! buck! buck!'

friday 24 feb '06.

a day late with the update as damo was being a girl and got sick on me, meaning we had to stay an extra night in Panaji whilst dame slept it off. we did watch rambo 3 though. quality.

since the last post we carried on bumming on the beach in Palalom - where i lost my bloc party orange glasses! i jumped into the sea and when i arose they vanished from my face - doh! have purchased some new red ones which you can see in future photos (some of the photos we added tonight are old ones). i also lost my pink hat! dammit!

from Palalom beach we went to Old Goa and looked at some portugese catholic churches, then moved on to Panaji, Goa's captal, where dame got sick. and he picks hes moments. we're on a casino cruise ship with unlimited drinks and buffet and ten minutes in he says hes not feeling well. then all of a sudden he gets up and rushes of to the bog. by the time hes comes back ive downed a couple of cocktails and he declares hes got runny poo (sorry, cant spell diahoare, see) and he wants to get of the ship. well he cant cause the ships taken off so we wait an hour or so before a little boat comes and carries him away. i stay on (of course - i did ask him! c'mon it was free drinks all night!) and consume the fine all-you-can-eat and drink experience. i then win my entrance fee back playing blackjack - 1400 rupees - thats about 20 pounds and a shedload of money in india. then went home and watched the chelsea barcalona game. cant win 'em all.

the day after damian slept in all day whilst i had a wander around town. i found the most crappest pub in the whole of india, no, the world. it could seat about 20 people if you crammed them all in. and it had tinted windows so there was viturally no light (they were scrimping on the electricity). stayed in and watched rambo 3 that night. US hero stallone kills russians to free afghanistan. how times have changed.

this morning dame felt better so we got on the bus and are now in Anjuna beach. we plan to do more bumming around here and Aranbol beach for around a week before we head to Bombay.

garlen xox

ps. i forgot to mention damian almost blinded me for life by poking a fucking oragami chicken into my left eye whilst shouting 'chicken! chicken! buck! buck!'. he thought it was the funniest thing ever. i nearly smacked him. i can laff at it now but at the time i was well angry with him!

also had my hair cut by dame. the styles kinda like david bowie circa ziggy stardust without the mullet. and also generally crapper. but it'll do as long as i put suntan lotion on it so it doesnt poof up (nice one des for that bit of advice). just wait till its my turn to cut his hair - im kinda thinking krusty the clown...

far away dame and garlens mozzied legs

bollywood star and sexy damo

went to the park, saw a bollywood film being made, got my photo done with the main guy. he told me he was really famous. no one else knew who he was though! liar!

pesky kids and royal bed

st francis and the moon

bull

goody baddie + Umesh

kovalm + Ralph

Pollam

My Arse Hurts

Bonjour,

Have finally got our guitars, Yay. through them we have learnt the art of Kabadi (a sort of indian Tag game) and entertained a few indian hotel owners (Well I think they were entertained). It's been a sort of cultral exchange. We showed this guy at a train station (we had to wait 8 hours) how to play British Bulldog and how to play guitar he showed us Kabadi and fed us bannanas. And then we played Guitar for the hotel owners and they showed us a hindu dance (was a bit weird to be honest).
(For those who I have e-mailed you will prob have read the next bit so skip and start again where I have put the astrix)

We also did our eight hour river cruise, was good fun, I felt like I was in Vietnam, I was tempted to wear a red head scarf and go by the name of John Rambo but decided against it. Then we stayed the night in a really nasty town - Kollam, we walked about in the day and had beggars coming at us like zombies, they waddled towards us making weird noises with out streched hands, we just Ignored them, its for the best. I did give one beggar kid some bread today as he was hasseling us at our table, but then he just started pointing at the jam, greedy blighter!

We also had our first night train experience, was loud dirty with squat toilets, a kid screamed for about an hour at six in the morning, it got mildly frustrating to say the least.

To get to the beach we're at now it took three days and we used four different types of transport; Train (14 hours + 8 hours waiting), Rickshaw, Bus and Boat (8 Hours) was a fantastic experience, our first real taste of what travelling is about! But I have realised what the UK is great for; comfy seats.

We're in Goa now (pollamlum), it's really relaxed here. Beer is cheap and everyone is really chilled, sort of like the Amsterdame of Indian (not quite as crazy as there is no real night life here, it's too hot to dance so everyone just sits in resturants talking) Palm trees behing islands coming out of the main land, golden sand etc.

***************************************************** Read again:
On our first night we went to a resturant run by a guy that looked like the football hardman, Razor Ruddock, he stubbed his fag out in our ashtray, gave our candle light away (as it was valentines day we were a bit upset) and looked menacingly at anyone who didn't clap at the act.

- The Act.
Elvis and Cliff, not Prestliey and Richards but two indian kids on keyboard and bass playing covers of songs in a thirties seaside sort of way. Imagine our confusion when they did Stevie Wonder; I just called to say I love Ye (Ye wasn't a typing error) in a sort of Pheonix Nights Pub keyboard singer style. But we felt we had to clap as Ruddock was standing in front of us watching us from his beady eyes.

Oh we bumped into Ralph the German again. He wasn't in his speedos this time. But that's the last three beach resorts we seen him at now, I think he might be following us! Scary I know!

As i'm typing James Blunt is playing so before I go completely Mad I'll say goodbye. (sorry for spelling and grammar we're on a time limit, there is no word and I don't have time - or I can't be bothered you decide - to sub).

Laterz

sit back and think of goa

hello england.

damian has the honours of updating our diary this evening, which gives me the chance to write random stuff. ok... thanks to everybody who emailed or wrote in the comments box. its really nice to hear from friends and family after our first two weeks of travel. it feels like we've been away forever. as we cant get such quality material as 'the news of the world' over here in india we really are closed off from the going-ons in england. so keep us informed. cheers seany for your email - 'campbell may be batty' made me laff out loud in the quiet internet cafe.

we've set aside thursday evening (when possible) as our internet time whilst on our travels so hopefully you guys and gals will follow our journey with us.

what else - happy belated valentines day to everybody. any goss u wanna tell (u can email me in private ;))? dame and i had the most surreal experience over our valentines dinner. it involved neil 'razor' ruddock (he's a footballer for the uneducated) and a casio keyboard. im sure dame will go into more detail.

ok - personals section (ooooh!).
to borders people - everybody happy? anyone else left?
my cousin in hong kong - thanks for your comment, how did u find this site? i will email u and maybe you can show dame and i round hong kong!
pauline and john - thanks for the dosh AGAIN!
alana - dames much prettier than seany! sorry seany! love you really. though u do have bigger boobs sean. always a plus in my book.
sophs - hows japan? and the teaching?
hannah s - u still in nairobi? hows yours furs? (funny everytime... maybe!)
simon d - well done on getting ur band together finally. how dyou sort that out. next step?
uj - 'make believe' on the radio! do i get royalties or what? haha! tell andy i played cricket on the beach with a bunch of indians. they take thier cricket very seriously. found out im not a bad mid paced bowler. and i took the most amazing catch (on the back foot, streching into the heavens and falling back into sea, then rising like a phoenix with ball clutched firmly in hand - stuff of legends)

garlen xox

top 10 culture shocks:
1) kids coming up to us and saying "how are you? what is your name? what is your address?' we've even had invites from adults back to thier house! we wisely decline though.
2) indian road etiquette is crazy. people will just casually walk across a road of speeding cars and bikes, and the cars and bikes dont stop for you either!
3) indians like spitting
4) an indian toilet is a hole in the floor. makes pooing interesting.
5) haggling. im rather good at it id say.
6) the price of things is nuts! yesterday we paid 50p each for dinner. tonight we treated ourselves and paid a quid. a bus ride cost me 5p.
7) lots of stray dogs. lucky i had my rabies jab.
8) indians walking bare feet. whats that about?!
9) almost all blokes (even kids) have moustaches. some of the girls do aswell.
10) the heat at midday is immense.

Caption Comp, post your entries on the comments page!

wheres sol?

Thurs 9th, 7.15pm, story so far...

the first 3 days we went to the temples, museums, galleries, parks and even the zoo of the the keralan capital city, trivandrum.

then bussed it like like a local to kovalam beach for 3 days where we played football and swam alot.

we then squeezed on the rush hour train where we arrived at varkalem beach yesterday. we proceeded to play more football and did more swimming. hard work i know but someones gotta do it.

tommorow we go see another temple. and then the day after we head to kollam where we will sail the keralan backwaters.

it feels like we'vew been gone for ages. england has become a distant memory. buying a football has made us the most popular people on the beach as they all want to play. we now plan to purchase a couple of guitars in goa, though im not sure this will make us as popular (unless they like oasis songs as theyre pretty much the only ones i know how to play). everything is far too cheap here. everybody save up, quit your scummy job, and come out and meet us! we've been living on an average of 5 pounds a day (including accommodation) . the only crap thing are the blood sucking mozzies. we hopefully will get some pics on soon when dame works out how to do it. he's bloody useless, dead weight if you ask me...haha...

anyway we've arranged to have dinner with some guy from kent who we met playing footie. so i better go. BTW my team won 3 v1 against damo's team. i scored a hat trick (i really am so proud)!

love and kisses to both mine and dame's family and friends. xox

ps. why's nobody filling me in on INVASION on channel 4? also have they found sol or not?

Hi

We've arrived. It's amazing here, it really is another world. Everything is different, from the food to the clothes to how they greet you (strangers wouldn't come up to you shake your hand and offer you their home address in England).

So far we've been harrased by groups of rickshaw drivers, the one who gave us a lift then got us lost, found a cocroach and gekho in our room, mobbed by school kids and visited a zoo and a few museums.

The streets and roads are really busy full of cars and people, it really is just like something from a film.

Oh and the zoo has a type of monkey that has apparantly 'Lost all fear of humans' so be careful next time you see a monkey.